Logically I know that my last blog post highlighting the good didn't actually jinx things. Still it feels like schizophrenia is somewhere saying: na-na, na-na, boo-boo... I'm better then you. I got your son... (again)
By Tuesday morning the negative symptoms were obvious. His case worker dropped by with something for my son to sign so she could help straighten out the disability thing. She commented on how 'flat' he was. One word answers. No expression.
I guess it took a week for the Olanzapine to come completely out of his system.
For a couple of days I was managing to get some vitamins in him although it was hit or miss on which ones. One day he took his multi-vitamins. The next day the B50. Another day the omega-3 because he thinks the multi-vitamin is giving him energy. Now he is not taking any of them.
He has been eating dinners as I have been trying to make things that I know he likes and is healthy to keep him eating. He is not eating outside of that.
His sleeping is all over the place, when he does sleep. He won't take his Melatonin for some reason. This kind-of sucks because the Melatonin we take has 5-HTP and L-Theanin which can help him.
Friday I actually left him home alone for the most of the day. After being up all night and the previous two days he had finally gone to sleep. It was a busy day for hubby and I. Hubby had two doctors appointments and each of them were over an hour. We had car parts to get. Also Friday was the last day of my hubby's interlock condition on his license! If you don't know what this is then it's a device that is put in your car to make sure there is no drinking and driving. He is finally free of it! So we had to go to the license place and we had to go have the device removed from the car which was another hour long appointment. I must say that although a long and tiring day, it was good to be out of the house doing 'normal' stuff. My son's case worker stopped by to check on him since I wasn't home.
Hubby walked away from the doctor's appointments with a ton of medications ;) He has been coughing up some green/black stuff and green is usually a sign of infection so he got antibiotics for that. He also got something for his back. While I'm all for chiropractor first... He was still not getting much relief and these seem to be helping his back to relax. Which should help his next adjustment go even better.
My son was up when we returned, playing online. This was the last time he played online that I'm aware of. I was worried that he might not be ok if he woke up and I wasn't here but he seemed ok. Said he didn't call because his phone was dead but that he was charging it. He did answer the door to his case worker.
Saturday we took him with us to help out my hubby's son with an errand.
Yesterday he decided not to go grocery shopping with us. This doesn't happen very often. He really likes to go but I'm guessing even doing that is becoming too much for him at this point. Yesterday was also his Dad's birthday. I brought it up once but I didn't bring it up again because I know he can't process it right now.
Tuesday his case worker told me that he has a new nurse coming on board. His case worker has been seeing him almost every week however I do believe this is supposed to be a nurse making the weekly house calls. His from awhile ago is on maternity leave. So his new nurse dropped by today. He seemed nice and my son seemed to be ok with him.
I actually took myself to the basement for a cigarette while he was here to give them a chance to talk as I know I have a tendency to interrupt... I think I did pretty good and only interrupted a couple of times ;) It was easy to tell that participating in the conversation was a struggle for my son. I'm surprised he managed to ignore the voices as well as he did. His nurse commented that his answers where pretty short and one worded... Yes that's all he is capable of right now. Actually this was the most he has spoken in days. It can take several times asking just to get an answer on what type of tea he wants after dinner. Not that he drinks it but I keep hoping that he will and take the supplements I keep putting out.
I walked out with the nurse and filled in some of the blanks and corrected some things. Like I told him, I don't know if it's my son being delusional or if he just knows what to say. He doesn't give accurate information on questions about sleeping, eating or activities. He told his nurse that he went to bed at 11 last night. I think this is because he has been told that it's a good bed time. He went to bed at 2 when I got up and had him go. He was wide awake at 5 when I got up. He didn't sleep. Same with eating. He says he has been eating good. Dinner only for most of the week now. He says he has been playing his games. He hasn't since Friday. He says that he has no voices. I told his nurse we call them entities. They started becoming obvious last Monday.
His smoking is up and down. His fingers are brown, I noticed last night. He may go awhile without but then will smoke sometimes three in a row. That seems to be lessening today. So while smoking a lot is not a good sign, smoking less is an even worse sign. When he is smoking a lot he is stressed. When he isn't smoking much than he has gone further into his head. He has actually been smoking the cigarettes that he didn't want (we couldn't return them, we tried) and not even complaining about them which isn't like him.
After several days of me nicely hinting, my hubby actually managed to suggest and get him into a bath on Thursday. I think he has been in the same clothes ever since. Will have to try and get him in clean clothes today after he wakes up. I'm pretty sure he is sleeping now. He had a short snooze yesterday but other then that has been awake since possibly Friday around noon. It's hard to tell sometimes. He will go to bed when I prompt him but that doesn't mean he is sleeping.
His nurse set up an appointment with his psychiatrist for tomorrow morning. That's an appointment that has been long overdue. We certainly need to do discuss his medications and how to proceed. I know I have been hesitant about upping his Invega due to possible lose of his libido however that doesn't seem to be happening right now anyways and honestly it's not something we need happening right now as when he is like this he can have no sense of keeping it private.
ADAPT called me this morning. She apologized for taking so long to get back to me. I let her know that my son seems to relapses so we set up a tentative follow up appointment in two weeks. She also gave me some information on the next family event that deals with concurrent disorders, mental illness and addiction, and who to contact to register. I have actually met the lady that I am to contact. We meet through the early intervention program my son was in before PACT. I have also talked to her at an event I attended through the Schizophrenia Society of Ontario.
I'm off. Gucci is demanding some petting time and the homemade beef jerky I made is calling my name...
Mom
BarbieBF
© BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey, 2014 - 2015. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blogs author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links to blog posts and/or pages as a whole (in there entirety) may be used provided that full and clear credit is given to BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Showing posts with label Libido. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Libido. Show all posts
Monday, April 27, 2015
Tuesday, February 3, 2015
He is not OK. Medications.
Like the title says... I really wish that I could pinpoint what triggered or caused this to be happening since Saturday night however I think what it boils down to is the wrong medication(s). For two years now I have read articles and stories about the difference that the right medication(s) and the right dose of medication(s) can make.
Currently my son is only taking one antipsychotic regularly and that is the Invega. He does take Olanzapine sometimes but only when I'm able to 'nicely' suggest it so that he can get a good nights sleep. As I did last night and he said that he took one.
In the past my son was the most stable and recovering while on Clozapine/Clozaril and Risperidone. How many of you add these medications to your computer's dictionary so that you know if you have spelled them right or not? ;) In June 2014 before the Adderall my son was maintaining stability and improving on 150 mg of Clozapine and 1 mg of Risperidone. Over a period of about nine months he had titrated down from 450 mg to 150 mg of Clozapine. Neurontin/Gabapentin and Trazodone was also in there however he never took it regularly. So he was doing really good on two antipsychotics that he took regularly. We added the Adderall for ADHD, lost stability and unfortunately have not gotten back to where he was in June 2014.
As most parents/caregivers know med-compliancy is a big part of the picture. What is important to me is not what is important to my son. If you have been reading my blog then you may be aware that I'm pretty sure my son wanted off the Invega Sustenna (injection) as it killed his libido. And yes it hurt to receive it. I have thought about discussing with his treatment team having the oral Invega upped from 6 mg to 9 mg. I did bring this up to his nurse on Monday however and this is a big however... I am worried about the increase having an affect on his libido and therefor causing him to become non-compliant with his medications.
Like I said. What is important to me isn't important to him. Keeping his libido is more important to him then losing his mental health.
Two tweets that I saw recently that apply here where from Dr. Xavier Amador. One stating that between 50 - 75% of those diagnosed with schizophrenia don't take their medications is prescribed. Another stated that about half don't know that they have schizophrenia. From my own research I know that this is due to anosognosia or lack of insight. It's part of the condition itself that stops the person from recognizing that what they are experiencing is part of the disorder.
I forget exactly what hubby and I were talking about the other night but it was about something my son must have said. I joked with my hubby that my son was telling confabulations because he has anosognosia. My hubby didn't understand me either :) This means that he was saying things that appear to be untrue because he can't see that they aren't true. Schizophrenia causes him to believe in things and see things that most of us don't. How realistic they are have little to do with my perception of reality and more to do with his perception which is being controlled by a disease/disorder that changes how he sees things.
Sorry I'm getting off track... Another concern is weight gain and other side affects from these medications. For awhile my son had to wear a belt with his jeans as they were falling off. I think it was two or three days ago that he commented that he needed new jeans because the ones he had on where getting tight. His eating habits haven't changed. What if increasing his Invega causes him to gain weight and become non-compliant due to this? I know on 450 mg of Clozapine he gained weight then lost it on lower doses.
From a medical standpoint or even that of his treatment team my son is stable and therefore ok. From my point of view, he is not ok. I have seen how well he can do and honestly I don't think I'm ready to accept that what I'm currently seeing or what he is experiencing, is the new normal for him. I know that for some voices etc are a daily part of their lives. I don't know... Maybe after his last break this will be his new normal?
So the question is: What can I do? My son IS being med-compliant. I can't risk interfering with that to any big degree. If we change his medications than we may lose that compliancy. Or worse put him on the wrong medication and lose his current stability. I don't even know what medication could be considered at this point. I do believe he has been on most of them. I do believe that Invega is a good medication for him however it doesn't appear to be enough on its own or at the current dose.
For the moment I will continue to hope that what he is experiencing is a hiccup and not long term. Sunday night he stayed up until after 3 AM and got a little upset with me when I pointed out that how he was talking was delusional. Sometimes, when he is doing good and his mood is stable, I am able to point this out to him without him getting upset. Sunday was not one of those times :) When he started telling me what I was saying (that I wasn't saying) I knew it was pointless and he was too wrapped up in what he was experiencing to listen to me anyways. I didn't push it, left it alone and went to bed.
The reality is that I can't do much about it right now. He is in driver's seat when it comes to his medications. As long as what he is experiencing is not bothering him and it's not, then he will not want to stop it.
He does seem to be a bit better today. I think he was playing a game on his computer and he is now watching stuff. I don't think he has touched his Nvidia gaming system in awhile. I heard him on the phone with his Nana stating that technology is boring and depressing. He can't see that it's symptoms of schizophrenia causing him to not get enjoyment out of these things. Schizophrenia can be depressing. I didn't listen to too much of that conversation as it was fairly delusional and it can be hard for me to stay quiet ;)
He wants to move to... Mexico? and live without technology etc., that it would be great. I did point out that the people living in Mexico without technology and basic necessities may not agree with his point of view. Like I said, hard for me to not say anything. I went for a smoke before I could say anything else. He loves technology... When he is healthy.
His case worker at PACT should be dropping by tomorrow with more Invega. She also contacted disability in British Columbia and got a letter from them for disability here in Ontario. *fingers crossed* this gets us somewhere as I have emailed BC again and now left his worker at disability 3-4 messages with no call back.
My son just asked how he could go about getting some money for an online game. Can he do grunt work with my hubby... It's hard to keep a straight face sometimes. I pointed out that I have seen how much energy he has lately, that he is like 'the walking dead' so I doubt that he has the energy for grunt work ;) He will have money when he has money and he can spend his 'just $28'.
What can I say... Life can be tough sometimes ;)
Mom
BarbieBF
© BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey, 2014 - 2015. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blogs author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links to blog posts and/or pages as a whole (in there entirety) may be used provided that full and clear credit is given to BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Currently my son is only taking one antipsychotic regularly and that is the Invega. He does take Olanzapine sometimes but only when I'm able to 'nicely' suggest it so that he can get a good nights sleep. As I did last night and he said that he took one.
In the past my son was the most stable and recovering while on Clozapine/Clozaril and Risperidone. How many of you add these medications to your computer's dictionary so that you know if you have spelled them right or not? ;) In June 2014 before the Adderall my son was maintaining stability and improving on 150 mg of Clozapine and 1 mg of Risperidone. Over a period of about nine months he had titrated down from 450 mg to 150 mg of Clozapine. Neurontin/Gabapentin and Trazodone was also in there however he never took it regularly. So he was doing really good on two antipsychotics that he took regularly. We added the Adderall for ADHD, lost stability and unfortunately have not gotten back to where he was in June 2014.
As most parents/caregivers know med-compliancy is a big part of the picture. What is important to me is not what is important to my son. If you have been reading my blog then you may be aware that I'm pretty sure my son wanted off the Invega Sustenna (injection) as it killed his libido. And yes it hurt to receive it. I have thought about discussing with his treatment team having the oral Invega upped from 6 mg to 9 mg. I did bring this up to his nurse on Monday however and this is a big however... I am worried about the increase having an affect on his libido and therefor causing him to become non-compliant with his medications.
Like I said. What is important to me isn't important to him. Keeping his libido is more important to him then losing his mental health.
Two tweets that I saw recently that apply here where from Dr. Xavier Amador. One stating that between 50 - 75% of those diagnosed with schizophrenia don't take their medications is prescribed. Another stated that about half don't know that they have schizophrenia. From my own research I know that this is due to anosognosia or lack of insight. It's part of the condition itself that stops the person from recognizing that what they are experiencing is part of the disorder.
I forget exactly what hubby and I were talking about the other night but it was about something my son must have said. I joked with my hubby that my son was telling confabulations because he has anosognosia. My hubby didn't understand me either :) This means that he was saying things that appear to be untrue because he can't see that they aren't true. Schizophrenia causes him to believe in things and see things that most of us don't. How realistic they are have little to do with my perception of reality and more to do with his perception which is being controlled by a disease/disorder that changes how he sees things.
Sorry I'm getting off track... Another concern is weight gain and other side affects from these medications. For awhile my son had to wear a belt with his jeans as they were falling off. I think it was two or three days ago that he commented that he needed new jeans because the ones he had on where getting tight. His eating habits haven't changed. What if increasing his Invega causes him to gain weight and become non-compliant due to this? I know on 450 mg of Clozapine he gained weight then lost it on lower doses.
From a medical standpoint or even that of his treatment team my son is stable and therefore ok. From my point of view, he is not ok. I have seen how well he can do and honestly I don't think I'm ready to accept that what I'm currently seeing or what he is experiencing, is the new normal for him. I know that for some voices etc are a daily part of their lives. I don't know... Maybe after his last break this will be his new normal?
So the question is: What can I do? My son IS being med-compliant. I can't risk interfering with that to any big degree. If we change his medications than we may lose that compliancy. Or worse put him on the wrong medication and lose his current stability. I don't even know what medication could be considered at this point. I do believe he has been on most of them. I do believe that Invega is a good medication for him however it doesn't appear to be enough on its own or at the current dose.
For the moment I will continue to hope that what he is experiencing is a hiccup and not long term. Sunday night he stayed up until after 3 AM and got a little upset with me when I pointed out that how he was talking was delusional. Sometimes, when he is doing good and his mood is stable, I am able to point this out to him without him getting upset. Sunday was not one of those times :) When he started telling me what I was saying (that I wasn't saying) I knew it was pointless and he was too wrapped up in what he was experiencing to listen to me anyways. I didn't push it, left it alone and went to bed.
The reality is that I can't do much about it right now. He is in driver's seat when it comes to his medications. As long as what he is experiencing is not bothering him and it's not, then he will not want to stop it.
He does seem to be a bit better today. I think he was playing a game on his computer and he is now watching stuff. I don't think he has touched his Nvidia gaming system in awhile. I heard him on the phone with his Nana stating that technology is boring and depressing. He can't see that it's symptoms of schizophrenia causing him to not get enjoyment out of these things. Schizophrenia can be depressing. I didn't listen to too much of that conversation as it was fairly delusional and it can be hard for me to stay quiet ;)
He wants to move to... Mexico? and live without technology etc., that it would be great. I did point out that the people living in Mexico without technology and basic necessities may not agree with his point of view. Like I said, hard for me to not say anything. I went for a smoke before I could say anything else. He loves technology... When he is healthy.
His case worker at PACT should be dropping by tomorrow with more Invega. She also contacted disability in British Columbia and got a letter from them for disability here in Ontario. *fingers crossed* this gets us somewhere as I have emailed BC again and now left his worker at disability 3-4 messages with no call back.
My son just asked how he could go about getting some money for an online game. Can he do grunt work with my hubby... It's hard to keep a straight face sometimes. I pointed out that I have seen how much energy he has lately, that he is like 'the walking dead' so I doubt that he has the energy for grunt work ;) He will have money when he has money and he can spend his 'just $28'.
What can I say... Life can be tough sometimes ;)
Mom
BarbieBF
© BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey, 2014 - 2015. All rights reserved. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blogs author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Links to blog posts and/or pages as a whole (in there entirety) may be used provided that full and clear credit is given to BarbieBF and Schizophrenia - Mom's Journey with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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