Clusterf....!

Generally speaking I am against swearing when other words can be used however I find myself thinking that clusterfuck best describes the situation I currently find myself.

Yesterday I received some news that had me smiling from ear to ear, for a little while anyways, until the reality of it all set in. As it stands right now my son will probably be released into my care! There is a saying that goes something like this: "The truth is like a lion. You don't have to defend it. Let it lose. It will defend itself." - St. Augustine. An accounting of my son's history and current circumstances did indeed speak for itself.

The relief I felt was short lived as my mind spun ahead to all the work that is still left to be done. All the work that has been unraveled. Sincerely hoping that the facts that I am currently looking at are not as bleak as they seem. If I am back to square one, where I was 18 months ago, I will not be impressed. My son's disability file out here may have been closed in order for a disability file to be opened where he is. If I have to start all over with disability and pay for my son's medications out of pocket yet again...

I have been advised that my son needs to be on a CTO (Community Treatment Order) which I totally agree with at least for now. The problem is that whatever conditions he is released under in British Columbia will not hold once we leave that province. He needs to be on one here in Ontario. Sounds easy right? Not if he doesn't meet the requirements in Ontario...

I am so pissed off right now! My son would most likely be in a home right now with daily support, learning to be an adult and chances are medication compliant and stable! But no... That wasn't good enough. Now look where he is?! Yup, I'm pissed!

Waiting for a call back from disability... their systems are down. Go figure! Once I hear back from disability I will have a better idea on what services I will require from a lawyer here. I did get a call back from the lawyer at the Public Guardian and Trust office and he confirmed it was as I thought, that anything I start in British Columbia doesn't apply to Ontario. Thankfully he is still technically a part of PACT out here so he will have access to treatment right away. Cross your fingers and toes for me that with a little (a lot!) of help I can figure all this out before I implode.

Mom
BarbieBF