Thursday, February 26, 2015

Brown Corduroy and Venlafaxine

I guess it was last Wednesday, after I attended the meeting at the shelter, that my son was given vouchers for the Salvation Army for clothing. I don't know what it is about brown corduroy that attracts him when he is not stable. He got a pair of corduroy pants and a brown coat. When he was in the shelter in September 2014 he found a brown corduroy jacket that he took a liking to. He seems to like the feel of it however I can't say that I like how he looks in these items.

Since last Wednesday hubby and I have seen him fairly frequently. Wednesday night hubby dropped off a carton of cigarettes on his way snow plowing. Thursday my son called, he needed a ride to disability as a check was waiting for him. That was an interesting conversation with his worker. Apparently I was making her feel guilty by trying to make her responsible for the money that office was giving him. Imagine that! Who should I be holding responsible? Avon? Anyways I apologized and stated that I'm frustrating with fighting every system to keep my son stable. He doesn't want to pay me room and board because he wants to buy 'luxury' items or drugs. She received the signed document giving me access to his file yet somehow doesn't seem to have the signed document stating that his room and board was to go into my account even though they were both dropped off and signed at the same time. She wouldn't acknowledge receipt of a fax I had sent the previous week stating my concerns. I can't say how many times I have been tempted to start writing letters to the local newspapers and our MP. I still might...

Eventually my son agreed to pay me room and board for January. I gave him $160 and agreed to allow $50 more for cigarettes that I would hold on to. Friday he was calling me stating that he had spent the $160 at a bar and was out of cigarettes. A carton in 2 days. His case worker from PACT saw him after that phone call and he told her he had $100. Not sure why he lied to her... or me. Friday hubby and I moved so I told my son that I couldn't make this a priority and he was going to have to wait. Saturday on the way to snow plow hubby dropped off 2 packs of cigarettes and $20. Sunday he is calling me that he is almost out of smokes and spent the $20 on junk food. Ya right! Monday we dropped of 4 packs of cigarettes and $5. Yesterday we dropped of 4 packs of cigarettes, some treats and $5. I told him that was it for the extra $50.

Last week I had him give me his tablet and Nvidia gaming system for safe keeping since he wasn't using it. He got into his head he wanted to sell them for furniture. You know for the place that he doesn't have... I told him I would think about buying the tablet from him when he gets a place so that he can buy furniture. Then he wanted me to sell the tablet and game so that he can buy a PSP portable. Hmmm no. I have done this twice now and I'm not doing it again.

He is supposed to get another check from disability tomorrow. He called me this morning wanting me to buy the tablet now so that he can have more money. If I had to hazard a guess at what is happening... It wouldn't surprise me if he is thinking about a plane ticket. If that is the case there is no way that I'm contributing to what I think will be the possible death of someone. Which would mean it's being discussed on a phone that I pay for, behind my back, again. Hopefully I'm wrong but if the past is an indication of the future...

Apparently my son said no to ADAPT for addiction help. He told me that he didn't but I have been told by I think 2 workers that he did. He is somewhat unstable however not unstable enough to not be up to his old tricks it seems. He is missing some doses of his medications. The night he went drinking of course being one of them. Sadly I don't think he has showered since he has been there and has been wearing the corduroys since he got them. Surprisingly he doesn't smell that bad.

Our move on Friday went very well. Thanks to my hubby's family it went quickly. I think this is the first time that I have been responsible for paying for my own electric heat. We pretty much froze for the first couple of days until hubby said that's enough. I guess seeing me sitting at my computer in a sweater, wrapped in a blanket with gloves on was a bit much ;) I just feel bad sometimes. I don't want to be any more of a drain on my hubby's money then I already am. My son does that enough ;) Still I didn't argue when he said turn up the heat. Now a sweater and slippers are manageable. We pretty much have everything set up except for putting up stuff on the walls. Yesterday we put my son's room together.

Tuesday I saw my family doctor for the remainder of my yearly physical. All my blood work looked good. It looks like my iron levels are up and my hemoglobin is now in normal range. I also had him put me on an antidepressant. I think a combination of worry/stress and my hormones are catching up with me. Everything was bothering me and getting on my last nerve. Poor hubby has been getting the brunt of it. My sensitivity to noise has gotten really bad to the point of wanting to cry over things that have only bugged me in the past. To be blunt, I've been a biatch with him since my son went into the shelter. Hubby says I'm losing weight. I've gone most of my life without people telling me I look or sound stressed. Now it's happening too often ;) He put me on Effexor or generic Venlafaxine. Started me on the lowest dose of 37.5 and to double it after 2 weeks. I asked to only stay on the minimum dose as I only want a little help until I can get things back together and I'm going to have to look into counselling. His office gave me some resources to look into. So it's up to me if I want to double it after 2 weeks. I joked with the pharmacist when I picked up the prescription that now it's my turn to be on meds. This is when I noticed that it was Venlafaxine as the doctor called it Effexor. Threw me for a second that I was being put on a medication that my son has been on.

The first dose made me fairly nauseous. Now it's not as long as I eat with it. It may be interfering a bit with sleep but that's hard to tell since my insomnia has been acting up again. I am taking it in the morning as it can cause bad dreams. I have noticed that sounds are not pissing me off as bad so that's a good thing. My doctor also said that it's a good med for menopause so it should be a good fit for what I'm going through. He mentioned hormone replacement therapy however I'm more comfortable treating my menopause with herbs and it's been working until now. I can up what I take for herbal supplements since I don't take the recommended doses anyways.

The day has gotten away from me so I'm off to start a loaf of bread. Make the house smell like home ;)


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